Mathesons Smoked Sausage

He was holding a Mathesons smoked sausage in his hand
He was thinking It was more salty than He’d planned
Matheson was watching and wondering what he’d think
Do you think we should wash it down with a drink?

Now lets try yours our Gordon said, does it taste as good as mine?
do I detect a hint of Chardonnay,possibly vintage 99
I’m not sure that I can beat it, but I shall surely try
And no need to let it spit now, I have something in my eye

Then along came the Glesga polis, with a broad smile
Ahh caught you now you blaggard,was it worth your while?
First it was your bosom buddy,Purcell with his cocaine
But I must ask you first, can you tell me what’s your name?

Now can you tell me what You’ve been doing in this car?
We’ve been observing you, from not so very far
Is that sausage your friend was smoking going away?
It seems to suffer from some shrinkage I might say.

In your statement which your giving us, this was a surgery of sorts
You have been doing some of your personal counselling of course
Its all part of your esteemed duties, to the many and the few
As you’ve been doing for so long now, to the gullible you screw

Let us see you safely home now,but first show you a little cell
Let us introduce you, to our esteemed fiscal friend as well
I am sure he’ll really like you, so no need to make a fuss
And let us drive you in our car, It’s more comfortable than the bus.

Rod Macfarlane

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About auldacquaintance

I am not a member of any political party. I am however a strong supporter of Scots Independence. Any views which I express in this Blog are purely my own. This Blog intends to be a place where I will be putting my views on Scots Independence. It will primarily concern itself with the upcoming Referendum In Scotland. However It will also be somewhat diverse in the range of day to day issues which are evident to me in modern day Scotland. Not all of it will be political, and indeed may take me off into avenues I am not even aware of yet. Please come and join in on this journey, and any comments are welcome provided they are not abusive! All the best from a new acquaintance! Rod
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7 Responses to Mathesons Smoked Sausage

  1. Macart says:

    Oooooooo that’ll leave a mark. :)

    Resignations all round?

  2. Well hidden until there was a disaster to keep it it hidden.Resignations? I bet none,but we could start to mention it a wee bit more for a week or two.Like one of the clowns in the Shitman,just replied to each comment with “What about Bill Walker” madness.

  3. balgayboy says:

    Awe well, metaphorically speaking it looks like skinning a smoked sausage in public is not crime in Glasgow according to the local procurator fiscal as there is insufficient evidence! reminiscent of previous failed prosecution regarding cocaine abuse by a previous incumbent. Nothing to see here…just move along now. Absolute disgrace.

    • Remarkable eh? witnessed by two witnesses who reported it to the police, and also by the police themselves….But procurator fiscal does not believe there is sufficient evidence..
      Interesting to see how the BBC and the press are covering it..or not.

  4. caadfael says:

    Methinks the PF should be investigated too!

  5. Boorach says:

    Congrats with being first with this Rod.

    Must admit I, as a wee Heilen laddie far from central belt wickedness and celebrities, wondered at first just what it was you were getting all poetic about!

    Being of an age I remember there was a time when folk had a sense of shame and being caught flagrente, regardless of orientation, would have resulted in instant resignation. Sorry, forgot he’s labour……. no shame then!

    • Yup..I was right on this just as the story broke. Can’t say I was all that surprised…but the whole scenario was so ridiculous I just had to poke fun at it.
      The real matter which is not at all amusing, Is the damage caused by the very real awful behaviour of these people, and the great damage they are doing to their constituents and communities, by their worst excesses… This nonsense doesn’t come close to the least of their depravity and self serving sense of entitlement.
      it may be however indicative of it.

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